I came to this pretty radical realization once again that I’m still only human. This was pretty crazy because I’ve come to this realization so many times in the past, yet I still keep coming back to it. In case you couldn’t tell by the way, I’m being very sarcastic when I say that this was “crazy.” It’s pretty obvious. However, just because something is obvious doesn’t mean that you truly understand it at its core. For me, I realize it for a moment and then immediately forget.
Part of me still believes that I need to be perfect. I don’t know where this idea originally came from, but I’m at least aware enough to know that I still occasionally think that. Even with the awareness, I still need to actively catch myself when I start heading back down that path. Changing your behavior is hard, especially when it’s deeply rooted within your own subconscious mind.
There is obviously no such thing as perfection. It doesn’t exist. Imperfection is what makes us human and should actually be celebrated as such. To be able to try something, fail, and then try again is remarkable. That is how we learn things. You’re never going to get something right on the first try, but if you let the fear of failure stop you then you are missing the point. Success shouldn’t be the goal whenever you try something new. The act of trying itself is already the success.
I’ve been getting so caught up with trying to help others heal and trying to be this enlightened being that it sometimes feels like I’m forsaking my own humanity along the way. Just because I give people advice on their healing journey doesn’t mean that I can’t simultaneously be making mistakes along the way. I have been, trust me. When I don’t show that, it feels like I’m showing up inauthentically. Whenever I show up like that, my body has a way of letting me know.
So rather than letting myself slip back into old patterns, I’m going to try something different this time. I’m going to try making more mistakes purposely. That might sound a bit crazy, but by forcing myself to make more mistakes I can undo the subconscious programming that mistakes are a bad thing. Making mistakes means that I’m learning and growing. And that is what is truly at the core of any healing journey. Growth.
So here’s to making mistakes and being fucking human.